Monday, June 06, 2016

How Much Are You Worth

How much are you worth? How much do you sell yourself out for?

I look down and ask myself how much am I worth on a regular basis.. right now, the average adult in southern Illinois is worth about $8.25 per hour.. thats minimum wage. some factory workers get paid between $14-16 per hour and an average wal mart employee makes $10 per hour.

Now this being said full time used to be considered 40 hours per week but ever since Obama and his "infinite Wisdom" created the medical reformation act, full time has now become 30 hours per week, which means not only do you get forced to buy insurance at an over priced rate but you also now earn a lot less money than you used to make. so that person that was originally making $330 per week is now making $247.50, that is $82.50 in lost wages per week or $4290 a year that has been lost.

now knowing this, a single person with one income makes about $990 before taxes and fica (social security which supposedly will run out before I get it, which is another story in itself) which ends up as being $721.77based on http://www.payrollforamerica.com/calculators/Illinois-payroll-calculator.php .
Now shall we add in costs of living? an average apartment in my town runs anywhere from about $400-$500 per month utilities from what I hear are similar as follows: average water starts at about $40-$60, electric about $175-$250, then there is food so look what has already been spent so far with even the cheapest 400+40+175=615 so lets hope you don't have a car payment or paying on anything else cause we still haven't included the cost of gas (locally $2.39 / gal when I wrote this), food, phone, consumables such as personal hygiene products, or anything like TV or Internet either oh and don't forget that insurance that is mandated by Obama. Right now as we are calculating you are seeing that this person working full time and is single only has $106.77 left from paying these bills.

now has any money been put back and saved at this point? probably not. By all rights we should be only paying out and living on 50% of our earnings or less, but as it turns out, the majority are living on about 75% or more.

So I ask you again, how much are you worth? you see this was just me trying to show you what average people around me are dealing with, how they struggle and how we as a community of people struggle daily to just exist. I myself am sick of just existing. I want to make more than that  little amount I quoted above, I am sick of being the man on the low end of the totem pole that every one craps on, on a regular basis. I know for a fact that I am not the only one that feels this way. But I tell you what in December of last year I met some people that gave me a small glimmer of hope, a star to steer by that I am trying to make work. Yes, it is hard work. Yes, you have to spend money to make money... But you know what? I see it working with so many people. I have met people over the last several months who have shown me so much that can come of this, and it is a way to escape from this living that isn't even a living. One man named Orrin Woodward call it the Matrix.. Its not hard to believe either because it does resemble it a lot.

So once more. HOW MUCH ARE YOU WORTH???
I know I am worth more than that $106 that was left over from those bills listed above, and so are you!

If you are interested to find out more information about what I am talking about, please feel free to contact me at 618.241.0328 or you can message me via hang outs or Google plus of even here by leaving a comment. I will get back with you I promises.

Write you again soon
~B

Sunday, June 05, 2016

Needed view points

Last night we went to one of our monthly seminars and heard needed viewpoints that we was needing to hear, for it was the same issues that we are dealing with in a sorts.
Basically both Sandi and I have been struggling with voices in our heads. I didn't know what hers was saying but I do know what mine always says all the time.. "Failure", "idiot", "worthless piece of crap", "you will never amount to anything", "what, you expected anyone to love you?" "Freaking retard", " stupid reject".
These are the things I've been told most my life and have heard it so much that I believed them so when I feel like I have failed, that negative self talk is what I do.. At least I no longer physically take it out on myself like I used to, no do I try to cop out and try to commit suicide... So many times did I try and take my life because in my head no one cared.

Last night we both without knowing almost didn't go, but we were glad we did. Frank and Courtney Cox were speakers. And soo much was said from them that we both could associate with, both their stories of struggle I could associate with and have been almost ready to give up with our business.  I have been hurting and struggling all my life with a lot of baggage that I have, which has cone back to taunt me as of late, and is partially why I have quit writing again too. My head hasn't been on strait and was knocked down, but this time it wasn't just me, I was also dragging down everyone around me. I felt like I was on the Titanic and had no life raft. But after last night, I feel like I can get back up and go another 10 rounds. See I spotted Courtney outside the meeting room as we was waiting for the ticket holders meeting so I asked Sandi if she wanted to go and meet her while there wasn't people crowding her. She spotted us even though she was talking to some one else she looked up and started talking to Sandi, but she locked eyes with me as if she could see deep down inside me and said "Don't give up, we could have and then we wouldn't be able to be here, the business works, don't give up just don't give up.. It takes a while some times and people will say you're crazy but what ever you do, don't give up".. Later on I actually got to go up and talk to Frank Cox, I was nervous and couldn't say anything, i was teary eyed knowing we had some similar experiences and what did i muster up to say.... " Awesome!" as i reached out to shake his had... Boy dis i feel stupid.. That one moment I could have gleaned a personal nugget of information and I dropped the ball... Guess what I had to listen for the 2 hour ride home... Yup the negative self talk of how stupid I was for not saying more.. But i thing that he knew i was choked up, so he didn't say anything either other than the two words "thank you".

Looks like its almost time to clock into my 9-5
Write to you later,
~B